Can’t keep up with your resolutions? Here’s why

I’ll be honest, I haven’t always been a big fan of New Year’s resolutions.

I always start out all fired up and full of drive and motivation to do all the stuff that I’ve set out to do.

But, right around this time of year, I usually make best friends with a giant pint of ice cream, the feeling of being a failure, and 5 lbs (if I’m lucky).

It stinks.

Boost  your motivation with the power of habitThis year, I was tempted not to make a resolution in the first place. After all, failure seemed inevitable.

But then I realized there is a certain drive for change that comes along with a new beginning. A new year in particular can give us that fresh, lovely feeling of starting off with a clean slate.

Resolutions help us take that purely emotional drive and translate it into a goal and an action plan that has the possibility to create lasting change.

Instead of giving up on making resolutions, I decided to discover what causes us to fail at them.

It turns out that overreliance on motivation drives failure.

Whoa, wait, what? No way, motivation is a good thing!

Yes! Motivation is awesome… to get you started.

But once you start… it’s not motivation that should keep you going!

Motivation leaves you too susceptible to the resistance within you.

You know, that part of you that would much rather you plop yourself down on the couch stuffing your face with nachos and ice cream while watching the one-millionth re-run of Friends than pop in that workout DVD or eat another salad.

Think about it!

When you start a resolution, the first day is always the easiest. Your motivation is high, you know you really want to make this change, and you kill it!

It doesn’t get hard until later. When you’re really sore, tired, bored, or just start losing some of that drive and excitement.

That’s when resistance really kicks in.

This little part of you loves the way things are right now. And it especially loves it when you stay within your comfort zone.

The very first thing it does? That’s right, it uses your soreness, boredom, discouragement, or guilt to sap you of all motivation.

How can I overcome resistance?

Don’t try arguing with resistance. It loves it when you try to fight it. You know why? Because it always wins.

Remember, resistance shamelessly manipulates your emotions in order to control you. By arguing with it you’re using your emotions (even if you don’t think you are, you really are) and only giving it more fuel.

That’s why you need to eliminate the need for motivation.

Below I’m going to give you the most effective weapons you have against resistance, and the tools you can use to eliminate your need for constant motivation, and achieve your goals.

1. Become an awareness ninja

You have to work to stay present. When you feel resistance against your resolution, and you reallywant to skip your workout, have that second slice of cake, or leave that work until tomorrow again, look inward and ask yourself who is talking.

Is it really you? Or is it your resistance?

We rarely give full attention to ourselves. Just being an observer to your thoughts and feelings can tell you so much about where your desires and actions are really coming from.

It will shed the spotlight on resistance like a serial killer being caught by the police.

Fostering awareness of yourself and a strong connection with your inner conscience will help you see exactly what is going on, and help give you the strength to move forward, one step at a time.

2. Take back your power

Realize that resistance does not own you. It could only tell you what to do while it was under your radar. Once you have brought this resistance into your conscious awareness, the power has returned to you.

Remember, you control your mind, your mind does not control you.

Sure, resistance will keep trying to talk you out of doing what you’re doing. Now it’s doing it right under your nose.

It’s like a cat trying to look innocent after you caught them tearing the toilet paper apart.

Will you give it the power to fool you once you’re aware of it? That is for you to decide.

3. Stubbornness is your friend

Now you’re aware of resistance.

You have made a conscious decision to take back your power.

Now it is time to detach yourself from it.

Do whatever it is that you’ve set out to do, whether at this moment you feel like it or not, whether you believe in yourself or not, whether you are tired or not. This is the power of sheer stubbornness.

You can let resistance continue to control you, by giving it back the keys to your decisions, or you can let it sit there and nag while you ignore its pesky voice.

Eventually, it will go away.

 

Join the conversation!

Share your experience with resistance! How does it usually “talk” to you, and what do you do to keep going anyway?

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